Current Events

Hospitalized Toddler To Spend Rest Of Life Associating ...

BATON ROUGE, LA—As a direct result of receiving pediatric emergency care service...

Prospective Car Buyer Takes SUV Out For Test Hit And Run

PHILADELPHIA—Saying he was in the market for a more powerful and rugged vehicle,...

Only Good-Looking Person In Office Mingles With Hideous...

CHICAGO—Showing a graciousness and magnanimity that the rest of the world has de...

Maryland woman changes routine, wins $248,208 lottery j...

A Maryland woman who felt like her favorite lottery game was letting her down d...

Watch: Gamer beats 'Super Mario Bros.' in 4 minutes, 54...

A dedicated gamer broke a Guinness World Record by beating 1985's classic "Supe...

4-year-old calls 911 to report 'mom ate his ice cream'

A 4-year-old Wisconsin boy called 911 to report his "mom was being bad" by eati...

Look: Pennsylvania firefighters rescue cat from car engine

Firefighters in Pennsylvania responded to a neighborhood for an unusual rescue ...

Wedge-shaped 'pie house' sells for $350,000 in Chicago ...

An unusual Illinois home dubbed the "pie house" due to its wedge shape sold for...

Air India asks passengers to stop flushing clothes down...

Air India is urging travelers to "use lavatories only for purposes they are mea...

Local Teen Invents Masturbation

The post Local Teen Invents Masturbation appeared first on The Onion.

Brothers become youngest to earn all 63 NPS Junior Rang...

A pair of Idaho brothers are believed to be the youngest people to earn Junior ...

Taylor Swift Spends Evening Editing Spreadsheet Ranking...

BEVERLY HILLS, CA—In an attempt to stay organized as she balances the demands of...

Elon Musk Creates Federal Employee Revenge Porn Database

WASHINGTON—Promising to use the U.S. DOGE Service to usher in a new age of gover...

Report Finds Ticketmaster Controls 80% Of Nation’s Midd...

WEST HOLLYWOOD, CA—In a new revelation shedding further light on the ticket sale...

Brothers become youngest to earn 171 NPS Junior Ranger ...

A pair of Idaho brothers are believed to be the youngest people to earn Junior ...

North Carolina man's prediction comes true with $100,00...

A North Carolina man's prediction to his son came true when he scored $100,000 ...

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