Man unaware all exes leave him off lists of previous sex partners

A MAN is completely unaware that every woman he has slept with, either consciously or unconsciously, fails to list him when discussing her past lovers. 

Martin Bishop, who works in furniture sales, remains oblivious that without exception his exes skip over him in conversations about their sexual pasts and most flat-out deny it.

Donna Sheridan, who was in a relationship with Bishop for nine months, said: “Oh yeah, Martin! I forgot about Martin.

“We’d been going out, sort of, a bit, for about three months before I even found out he’d slept with my friend Carina. Not that I was bothered. I mean, it’s Martin.

“It’s not like he was bad, exactly. Just… unmemorable. Not really one you’d boast about or be ashamed of. But not really mentioning when you need to trim the old body count.”

Bishop’s role in their sexual history has also been omitted by one-night stands, hookups with friends, hookups with colleagues, holiday romances, his friend’s sister Janet who he lost his virginity to and a woman called Katrin who gave him an STI in 2019.

Bishop said: “I did the responsible thing when I discovered I’d caught a dose and texted all my recent partners. Only two answered, both asking ‘who is this, sorry?’”